I don’t know. I still don’t know. Damn ‘know’. I still do not understand ….. calculus and coordinate geometry ….. and physics which insist you should understand the first two if you have to understand the formulae. These are just a few of those many things I never understood. I suffered them till Std. XII ….. and how!
Swimming was something I did not know. My teenage Victorian morals would not allow me to get into the pool in a swimsuit ….. until my nephew learnt to swim. How could I not know how to swim?! Damn morals. I donned on the swimsuit, got into the pool, learned to swim, almost drowned, was rescued (blame the person who saved me – one of the purposes of his life was to ensure that you have to read this. Of course he would not be aware of this purpose of his existence) and now I know how to swim. But since there is no warm water pool in my vicinity and my old bones cannot endure the cold water, I still ‘can’t’ swim. I did not accept the first ‘cannot’. The second I am forced to accept.
Coming back to calculus and coordinate geometry ….. I did not want to come back to this dimension just in order to master this. Not a good idea to go with unfulfilled dreams and wishes. So it was that I joined a well reputed online class and tried to learn it. Found it got stuck at one point and never even started teaching me what I wanted to learn. Eventually I gave up on it. Till I HAD to accept that it was not my cuppa tea (no, not even my filter kapi). I have made my peace with the fact. The youngsters in the family mastered the subjects, but not I. I am probably dumb. It is ok. What would the world be without dumb people? Whom would the smarties compare themselves with? To be smart, there has to be the duality – smart and stupid. I have found my purpose in life ..... to give others an objective comparison point to establish their identity. I accept my purpose and my limitations. I live a perfectly contented and fulfilled life even without knowing calculus or coordinate geometry. Am perfectly happy to leave those rarified higher realms of knowledge to the smarter ones. Let them create technology. I shall happily use them! 
